It's true. They are. I wish i could post a picture to show you. But i'm not brave enough.
The phrase, "Just because it zips, doesn't mean it fits" is coming to mind.
Ho hum.
Monday, July 16, 2012
Saturday, July 7, 2012
gettin there
Time is running out to see my two little girls running down the halls of our very first home. I love to hear them conversing (mostly fighting) in the playroom. Some of my best phrases are: "Julie, do you want to go play in my room?" and "Jules! Noooo! Stop pulling my hair!" and "Ok Juju, you wear this hat and I'll wear this dress, ok Juju?" And from Julianna: "Uuuuhh-oooh." "Pup Pup" "Beellll-uuuh....Bell-uh?"
I hope these days do not fade quickly from my memory. The days our family of four all slept in one bedroom-Julianna in her pack-in-play (or our bed) and Isabella on her toddler cot (or our bed). The days we do not have to climb stairs to crawl into bed. The days where their bedrooms were just additional play rooms.
We have been busy packing up the house little by little. We take breaks. We take breaks a lot. Our breaks last longer than our non-breaks. Hmph. I hate moving. I hate packing and i hate unpacking. I hate being so excited about the next big chapter in our lives only to be depressed about our lives changing once the time nears.
But i do love hearing Bella say, "Mama, are they still working on my new house? When do we go again? Me and Juju are going to have the same room?" I love that Bobby has done everything he can to get us into the place we so longed to live. I love all the decorating plans i have in mind for the new home. And i especially love how i will feel once we move in and are settled. It will feel like our home and not like we are passing by. I never felt that way in our current home. I would make home improvements for the resale value only. I knew it would only be our temporary home. Even with all the memories, I knew we would walk away from it one day. So we are gettin there...
I hope these days do not fade quickly from my memory. The days our family of four all slept in one bedroom-Julianna in her pack-in-play (or our bed) and Isabella on her toddler cot (or our bed). The days we do not have to climb stairs to crawl into bed. The days where their bedrooms were just additional play rooms.
We have been busy packing up the house little by little. We take breaks. We take breaks a lot. Our breaks last longer than our non-breaks. Hmph. I hate moving. I hate packing and i hate unpacking. I hate being so excited about the next big chapter in our lives only to be depressed about our lives changing once the time nears.
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Bella's Babbles
- Don't eat that dada, it's not chocolate. It's poop!
- Ewwww! Dis-tus-ting
- That's a must-a-mash (mustache)
- Mama, put me back in your stomach and then I'll come out of your butt! (where babies come from)
- Mama, give me a cousin in there. (As she points to my stomach. My sister and Bobby's sister is pregnant. She thinks all babies are cousins!)
- "Sexy and i know it!" (Thank you pop music.)
- What's happ-in-ing to me? (when something hurts :( )
- I have to go potty, and so does Ju Ju! (they have the same pee and poop schedule, no lie)
- Oh mama!!! My chones (underware)?? You washed them? Thank you Thank you! (As she holds them close and hugs me)
- Whatcha doin? Mama, Whatcha doin?
Thursday, April 19, 2012
My place is with you
Often, when love stories have progressed from the early days of absolute bliss, you enter a state of "Is this really the one?" Soon the questions begin: Is this the person i was meant to be with? Is this the person i want to spend my life with? More importantly, is the person I am when i'm with him, really me? Is it the person i want to be? Can he really love me forever? Am I what he imagined?
I met you when i was twelve years old. I thought i had everything figured out, as most pre-teens do, and i had my whole future planned. I thought i would meet my one true love after i graduated college, if ever. Certainly no one really serious ever enters someone's life until you have had a chance to grow and learn what kind of person you really are.
Our age was always a factor to everyone else, and soon it became my worry as well. I fought against us. You don't find your soul mate when you're twelve years old.
You have been there at every stage of my ups and very lows. Even when we were not together, we were together. You were always there even when i didn't want you to be. You knew me deeper than i knew myself. And yet, you loved me. You loved me and you still love me.
I would imagine the cities i would live in. The big career i would have. The very important people i would meet. These dreams made me happy. They made me feel important. As i mature, i know that my dreams lie with you. No matter where we are. My place is with you.
You have given me my happiest moments. You give me peace at the end of everyday. You will give me all my dreams. You have never said no to me, not once. I hope i can make you smile the way you make my heart smile. I hope that I am the wife you imagined i could be. I hope that i am the mother to your girls that you can be proud of.
I love every inch of you. My soul reached for yours and it will never let go. You make the days easy, you are so easy to love. I love you. I love you. I love you. Here's to Me & You. <3
My Love,
"You are never far from me"
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Happenings
One: The House
So, the house Bobby and I decided on is about to go vertical this week! Eek. I get so excited about this new place that will hold so many of our family's events. School mornings: hustling to get the girls dressed, fed and out the door with their homework! Weekend BBQs: Bobby grilling at his outside kitchen, the girls chasing Bruno and the fresh squeezed lemonade in a glass pitcher (ok, maybe that fresh squeezed part was in an episode of Leave it to Beaver, but come on man, these are just my fantasies!) Holiday moments: Trolling the neighborhood for Halloween candy, girls watching Macy's Day Parade in the Family Room while i baste a turkey, waking on Christmas Morning to screams of delight as the girls find out that Santa ate all their cookies! Now all i need is the energy, creativity and patience to create these memories for the girlies. I can't wait to move in. I am already selecting new furniture for the rooms!
Two: The Cruise
The time is nearing for our departure oversees! We are busy booking excursions and memorizing the ship's decks. I am starting to shop for the wardrobe now and I'm trying to get too carried away. I know that dresses will be the main event since they are easy to roll up and what's easier than throwing on a dress and some sunny sandals? I'm liking this look but i'm too cheap to buy all those accessories!
So, the house Bobby and I decided on is about to go vertical this week! Eek. I get so excited about this new place that will hold so many of our family's events. School mornings: hustling to get the girls dressed, fed and out the door with their homework! Weekend BBQs: Bobby grilling at his outside kitchen, the girls chasing Bruno and the fresh squeezed lemonade in a glass pitcher (ok, maybe that fresh squeezed part was in an episode of Leave it to Beaver, but come on man, these are just my fantasies!) Holiday moments: Trolling the neighborhood for Halloween candy, girls watching Macy's Day Parade in the Family Room while i baste a turkey, waking on Christmas Morning to screams of delight as the girls find out that Santa ate all their cookies! Now all i need is the energy, creativity and patience to create these memories for the girlies. I can't wait to move in. I am already selecting new furniture for the rooms!
Two: The Cruise
The time is nearing for our departure oversees! We are busy booking excursions and memorizing the ship's decks. I am starting to shop for the wardrobe now and I'm trying to get too carried away. I know that dresses will be the main event since they are easy to roll up and what's easier than throwing on a dress and some sunny sandals? I'm liking this look but i'm too cheap to buy all those accessories!
So this is where the cruise is at today. Booking excursions and planning outfits!
Three: 4 year Anniversary!
This Thursday will mark 4 years for hubs and I. This past Saturday he booked a room for us at a resort. During the day we got massages and I got a facial. Then we got ready and went out to eat. We had wonderful recommendations of near by lounges we should try for after dinner cocktails. We were ready for a night of boozing but instead we both decided on a movie! We were back in our room by 12:00am! We are such party animals. It was a great night though. It was beautiful weather and our room was right on the golf course. The next morning we had breakfast at the resort restaurant and dined outside by the lake. It was a great view to enjoy omelets! It was nice getting to spend a day with each other to rejuvenate for parenthood.
We are so wrapped up in the kid's well being and trying not to miss opportunities to have fun as a family, that we forget that its ok to be selfish and want it to just be us for a night. I love to watch him hold our girls as they fall asleep, but it was nice to be back in those arms for a night. He is the man i thought he would always be, though it still shocks me everyday how attentive he is and how hands-on he is with the girls. I know I'm lucky to have him!
*Photo taken by CV Photography
Four: My first race.
No excitement for this one. I have not prepared myself. On Saturday Bobby and I will be running the Pat Tillman race. I should mention that Saturday will also mark the first 100 degree day here in lovely Phoenix. I hope i make it through without dying of heat stroke or exhaustion. Did I mention that it is only a 4.2 mile race? Yeah, I'm THAT out of shape. Wish me luck!
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Strength of my Love
Julianna,
You turned 1 year old last week. We had a huge blowout for you and you were the perfect baby through it all. Typically, littles your age are overwhelmed by the commotion and lack of sleep that a party brings. You my dear, were not! You took two naps during the party and you let everyone hold you without fussing. You gave everyone that special smile and you even played with the big kids. You looked like a pro when it came to hitting the piñata! You grabbed the stick from Tata Robert and started banging it, while smiling of course! When people sang "Happy Birthday" to you, you smiled and then politely clapped! I made your cake, Strawberry Lemonade, and i think the icing was just a wee bit too tart for you! You are a doll and you are so loved.
*Pictures taken by CV Photography
Happenings:
On the eve of your birthday, you took your first official stroll!!! We were very tired it was around 10:15pm. We were just getting finished setting up for your party. You were falling asleep in Nana Sarah's arms and then you got a burst of energy. You wanted to be put down so that you could dance on the floor to the music playing. A Michael Jackson song came on (now I can't even remember which one, I'll have to ask your dad) and you started bobbing your head and clapping your hands. You stood up next to the table and started moving all around. We felt it coming, I think your dad reached for his phone to take video and I even said out loud, "I should get my camera." We could feel the big steps coming! While still dancing, you looked at your dad and just decided to walk (at least 5 steps) to him. You simply let go of the table and took off. You had discovered a new mode of transportation, and for 15 minutes straight, you would take 5 or 6 steps and then fall, get back up, take another 5 or 6 steps and fall and get back up. You were having such a good time! And to think, we almost put you to bed moments before!
Little Babbles:
"Wassat?" (What's that?)
"Eh-Lo" (Hello?) you put the phone up to your ear for this one.
"hIIII!!!" You say this while tilting your head and trying to get someone's attention.
"Mama"
"daaa-daaa"
"Boh-no" (Bruno, your dog)
Pa-pa (this means food)
Baaaaa (When you saw the sheep at the farm)
You can say Nana and Tata.
I think your dad mention that you said "Tanks" once while he was changing your diaper. (You are so polite!)
You shake your head yes and no. (Actions sometimes speak louder than words)
Teeth:
None! You and your sister are both late bloomers in this area.
Favorites:
You love the Puppy Dog toy that sings and claps and makes all kinds of noise.
Anything your sister is playing with fascinates you.
You cannot go without your blanket. Just like your big sis, you love to cuddle up with a blanket. Right now you like the really soft pink one but i am trying to incorporate others so you aren't too attached to one specific blanket.
Your favorite place to sleep at night is still our bed but you are getting better at sleeping in your pack n play positioned fairly close to mama!
Julianna, I never imagined loving you as much as I do! I could not fathom loving another child as much as your sister. But I guess it is just another super power trait of mothers! You are my joy in everyday. When I see your sweet face my heart still melts. I love holding you so tight and listening to you giggle as I nuzzle your neck. To me, you will always be my baby girl and I will always want to protect you from all foreign things. But fight against me, live your dreams and make your voice heard!
You turned 1 year old last week. We had a huge blowout for you and you were the perfect baby through it all. Typically, littles your age are overwhelmed by the commotion and lack of sleep that a party brings. You my dear, were not! You took two naps during the party and you let everyone hold you without fussing. You gave everyone that special smile and you even played with the big kids. You looked like a pro when it came to hitting the piñata! You grabbed the stick from Tata Robert and started banging it, while smiling of course! When people sang "Happy Birthday" to you, you smiled and then politely clapped! I made your cake, Strawberry Lemonade, and i think the icing was just a wee bit too tart for you! You are a doll and you are so loved.
*Pictures taken by CV Photography
Happenings:
On the eve of your birthday, you took your first official stroll!!! We were very tired it was around 10:15pm. We were just getting finished setting up for your party. You were falling asleep in Nana Sarah's arms and then you got a burst of energy. You wanted to be put down so that you could dance on the floor to the music playing. A Michael Jackson song came on (now I can't even remember which one, I'll have to ask your dad) and you started bobbing your head and clapping your hands. You stood up next to the table and started moving all around. We felt it coming, I think your dad reached for his phone to take video and I even said out loud, "I should get my camera." We could feel the big steps coming! While still dancing, you looked at your dad and just decided to walk (at least 5 steps) to him. You simply let go of the table and took off. You had discovered a new mode of transportation, and for 15 minutes straight, you would take 5 or 6 steps and then fall, get back up, take another 5 or 6 steps and fall and get back up. You were having such a good time! And to think, we almost put you to bed moments before!
Little Babbles:
"Wassat?" (What's that?)
"Eh-Lo" (Hello?) you put the phone up to your ear for this one.
"hIIII!!!" You say this while tilting your head and trying to get someone's attention.
"Mama"
"daaa-daaa"
"Boh-no" (Bruno, your dog)
Pa-pa (this means food)
Baaaaa (When you saw the sheep at the farm)
You can say Nana and Tata.
I think your dad mention that you said "Tanks" once while he was changing your diaper. (You are so polite!)
You shake your head yes and no. (Actions sometimes speak louder than words)
Teeth:
None! You and your sister are both late bloomers in this area.
Favorites:
You love the Puppy Dog toy that sings and claps and makes all kinds of noise.
Anything your sister is playing with fascinates you.
You cannot go without your blanket. Just like your big sis, you love to cuddle up with a blanket. Right now you like the really soft pink one but i am trying to incorporate others so you aren't too attached to one specific blanket.
Your favorite place to sleep at night is still our bed but you are getting better at sleeping in your pack n play positioned fairly close to mama!
Julianna, I never imagined loving you as much as I do! I could not fathom loving another child as much as your sister. But I guess it is just another super power trait of mothers! You are my joy in everyday. When I see your sweet face my heart still melts. I love holding you so tight and listening to you giggle as I nuzzle your neck. To me, you will always be my baby girl and I will always want to protect you from all foreign things. But fight against me, live your dreams and make your voice heard!
"No one else will ever know the strength of my love for you.
After all, you're the only one who knows what my heart sounds like from the inside."
Friday, March 30, 2012
A year's reflection
Where to begin? Where to stop? Many things have changed in this last year. Many moments passed by so quickly I didn't even really live them. Other moments felt like they would live on and on for eternity.
In the beginning, days and nights had no breaking point. There was not a space in time that made us recognize one day from the next. I sat in a solitary chair for what seemed like months. I was sure I would get bed sores on my butt! I envisioned eating all my meals in that one chair for the rest of my life, never to eat at the kitchen table again! But those moments gave me the opportunity to study that sweet face. To watch her body being nourished. Those were the days that she was teaching me what each and every sound that she made, meant. Those were the nights she was teaching me her favorite bed time songs. Those were the nights I taught her to be a cuddler. I would press her tight against me and hold her all night long. Those were the nights that I memorized her sweet smell. I think her scent will always be in my heart.
She grew and she grew... When I went back to work after 6 short weeks, I of course was heart broken. But also anxious to get back to work that was so fulfilling. An 8am-5pm job that gave me such happiness during those hours and even more happiness that I did not have to bring work home with me. I was released to go home to my babies and Bobby and just be. I was home in time for her evening feedings and home in time for the nightly bath. It was fun to watch her move from her baby bath tub into the GIGANTIC ENORMOUSLY big girl bath tub with her older sister. They splashed and shared (when i say shared, i mean i made Isabella give her back the toys!). She grew from an infant to a spongy baby! From week 7 to month 9, I felt like i had missed everything about her. Since i was back at work, i had no idea what time she went down for her morning nap or how long she napped for. I didn't know if she liked her bottle as soon as she woke up or if she liked to wake up nice and slow.
But we had our nights! I felt like we were in a secret society that met at night and told secrets while the rest of the family slept. I'm sure she was just as tired as i was on those long nights, but she missed me and wanted to make up for the day's missed time together! Yeah, i'm sure it was just that!
Now, she is on the verge of walking. She will turn 1 in one day. She will play more self sufficiently with her sister and forget about all those longs nights she wanted only me. Soon, she will be reaching out for her sister's hand (and i will smile, remembering the times i chased after my older sister's hand) begging her to let her tag along. She is only turning one, but to me, this marks the end of her being solely dependent on her mama. She is learning how to take her first steps into a life that I hope will bring her accomplishments, lessons learned, unbreakable friendships made, and good hard tears cried. I want her to feel all that life is going to give her. She is a gentle soul, I hope this world will be gentle to her.
This year has not flown by, this year was lived in every waking hour. Those hours were plentiful and a bond was created. She has been a patient baby. She has been a baby waiting to make her entrance. I think this is the year for her. No more watching in sister's shadow as she commands the crowd's attention. I think we are all about to meet a Julianna that has been waiting her turn. Like i said, she is a patient baby and I love her with all my living being.
In the beginning, days and nights had no breaking point. There was not a space in time that made us recognize one day from the next. I sat in a solitary chair for what seemed like months. I was sure I would get bed sores on my butt! I envisioned eating all my meals in that one chair for the rest of my life, never to eat at the kitchen table again! But those moments gave me the opportunity to study that sweet face. To watch her body being nourished. Those were the days that she was teaching me what each and every sound that she made, meant. Those were the nights she was teaching me her favorite bed time songs. Those were the nights I taught her to be a cuddler. I would press her tight against me and hold her all night long. Those were the nights that I memorized her sweet smell. I think her scent will always be in my heart.
She grew and she grew... When I went back to work after 6 short weeks, I of course was heart broken. But also anxious to get back to work that was so fulfilling. An 8am-5pm job that gave me such happiness during those hours and even more happiness that I did not have to bring work home with me. I was released to go home to my babies and Bobby and just be. I was home in time for her evening feedings and home in time for the nightly bath. It was fun to watch her move from her baby bath tub into the GIGANTIC ENORMOUSLY big girl bath tub with her older sister. They splashed and shared (when i say shared, i mean i made Isabella give her back the toys!). She grew from an infant to a spongy baby! From week 7 to month 9, I felt like i had missed everything about her. Since i was back at work, i had no idea what time she went down for her morning nap or how long she napped for. I didn't know if she liked her bottle as soon as she woke up or if she liked to wake up nice and slow.
But we had our nights! I felt like we were in a secret society that met at night and told secrets while the rest of the family slept. I'm sure she was just as tired as i was on those long nights, but she missed me and wanted to make up for the day's missed time together! Yeah, i'm sure it was just that!
Now, she is on the verge of walking. She will turn 1 in one day. She will play more self sufficiently with her sister and forget about all those longs nights she wanted only me. Soon, she will be reaching out for her sister's hand (and i will smile, remembering the times i chased after my older sister's hand) begging her to let her tag along. She is only turning one, but to me, this marks the end of her being solely dependent on her mama. She is learning how to take her first steps into a life that I hope will bring her accomplishments, lessons learned, unbreakable friendships made, and good hard tears cried. I want her to feel all that life is going to give her. She is a gentle soul, I hope this world will be gentle to her.
This year has not flown by, this year was lived in every waking hour. Those hours were plentiful and a bond was created. She has been a patient baby. She has been a baby waiting to make her entrance. I think this is the year for her. No more watching in sister's shadow as she commands the crowd's attention. I think we are all about to meet a Julianna that has been waiting her turn. Like i said, she is a patient baby and I love her with all my living being.
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