Today my baby boy turned one. One whole year old he turned today. It was a year of firsts; First breath, first
laugh, first Christmas, first steps and a monumental first birthday. We’ll celebrate with our extended family on
Saturday, but last night was just a celebration with our little family.
Sure I wanted to do more. Like actually make a homemade dinner like I
did for his two sisters. A special
dinner just for him. But truthfully,
mama was tired and had a searing headache and Bobby wasn’t feeling too well either. So I fed him some crunchies (his favorite
right now) and some of his baby food.
The rest of us got Mexican takeout and he shared my mini chimis with me.
His sisters played with balloons that I am prepping for his
party and tried and tried to steal and successfully play with one before I took
them away. I was afraid one would pop in
his face and take out an eye or something.
Like that would really happen, right?
Why not just let the little guy play with something that makes him so
extremely happy? Well he did manage to
sneak to the other room and pop a balloon in his face. He didn’t cry but Bobby still ran over to
retrieve the rubber parts before he ingested them. Ok, so there is danger.
After dinner we all gathered around an iced cookie with a
single candle in the middle and sang to him.
He got to eat the cookie and he devoured it. He shared a little with Julianna. Bella wasn’t a fan of that kind of cookie so
she passed. Then we settled in to watch
some brainless TV and snuggle. I fed him
a bottle, that thankfully he let me hold for him, and I sang him Happy Birthday
quietly and then You Are My Sunshine.
Just like I had on the night he was born. And just like on the night he was born he
closed his eyes and settled into my arms and I could feel him at peace. Then the doorbell rang!
We had a surprise visit from the grandparents who came to
wish him a Happy Birthday and to show me some incredible pictures of Bobby on
his 1st birthday. Let me tell you. I would not know the difference
between the two. Little Robert looks so
much like his dad. It warms my
heart.
He got his first hair cut today. Bobby took him to his long time barber and
introduced Robert to Barber Shop! Bobby
said he sat there biting on his lollipop and just let the woman cut his
hair. Such a good boy. And like all first baby boy haircuts, he
instantly turned into a little boy. He sent
me a
text of the after and I started tearing up.
My little baby now a little boy.
I write this day down in detail because I don’t want to
forget our last day of a “first” birthday.
Robert is my baby and he’s also my last baby. He is my only boy and the only one of my
babies who still preferred mama to dada after six months. He loves when I sing to him. Especially “You are my Sunshine.” It quiets his cries almost every time. He loves to bury his face into my shoulder or
neck. I can feel him take in my scent
and it makes me hug him tighter. He
loves to follow his sisters around when they play. When they are sent to bed, he crawls into
their room and tries to play with them by their bedsides. He is starting to say “mama” or something
that sounds like “mama”. He only says it
when he is crying for something, but I’ll take it! He is walking almost entirely now. Very rarely will he crawl. Yet, he hates walking in shoes. He prefers to go barefoot I guess like most
babies learning to walk. He loves food. He eats almost everything we eat. When he is sleepy he likes to cuddle up with
his blanket, just like his sisters. He
is a one year old.
A few nights ago he did not want to lie in his crib and this
is unusual for him. He actually likes
his crib so I knew this was a special circumstance. So I took him back to bed with me and we laid
there looking at each other and he giggled.
Then he reached out gently and put his hand on my cheek and smiled. He melts me.
We had a quiet moment right before he turned one and I’ll cherish
that.
These three kids
challenge me every day and I am often frustrated. Then in one instant,
completely in love again. Motherhood is
changing for me now. I have a four, two
and one year old and I have to learn to be a mom all over again. Baby motherhood seems easier now. You bathe them, feed them, change them and
play and love on them. Now there are
many questions asked all day long that I have to answer carefully. There are extreme tantrums that sometimes
come in two different directions and I don’t know how to attend to both
simultaneously. Now, there is a lot of
guilt on my end. But I’m learning to
change and grow into this toddler stage of motherhood. I want to be a mom they can look back on and
say, “How did she make things so fun all the time and manage to keep us clean
and fed?” I’m not quite there yet. I fall short on many things. But I’m learning. I’m learning and changing.
Thank you to my babies who make my life challenging with
unexpected days. Thank you for your hugs
and laughs and your “I love you” moments.
Last night was a last of the first birthdays for our little family.
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